Tips for Eating Out Screen-Free
You can't go to a restaurant without seeing a child with a phone or tablet in front of them. When a child is given a screen and headphones during a meal two things happen. First, they miss out on a rich social experience and secondly, they are not able to practice critical skills that they'll need later in life. As adults it's easy to take for granted everything that happens when we eat out. Socially, it's an opportunity to interact verbally with the people they're sharing a meal with, but also to interact with a new environment. By simply being present and aware, children will be able to observe how a restaurant works: Where does food come from? Who brings it? What about drinks? What do we do if we need something? How do people behave in a restaurant? What is the order and timing of a meal eaten out?
The most important skill learned in eating out is waiting. Like so many other times when a screen is given to a child, we're taking away an opportunity for them to learn and practice patience. If you aren't sure if waiting matters, just google the marshmallow test. So how to manage a meal screen free? Read on for my favorite tips and tricks.
It all starts at home
We have well-established expectations surrounding food. G is allowed to eat pretty much whenever her little toddler tummy says she needs to, but when we're home, eating is done in one of two places. She either sits at the table in her chair, or if she's having snack while helping me prepare a meal, she's allowed to eat while standing on her learning tower. When we sit down to eat, G knows that she is required to stay at the table while eating, and if she asks to get down, it means she's done with the meal; we don't allow her to come and go from the table. She's currently 27 months old and this has been our routine since she was about eighteen months old. We offer lots of reminders that if she's going to get down to play, she's finished eating, and we also remind her that Mommy and Daddy are still eating, so if she chooses to leave the table she'll be playing alone until we're finished.
Having clear expectations at home has made eating out easier for us because G already knows what to expect during a meal.
Know their limits
G is able to consistently sit through a meal when we go out to eat. That said, we aren't going to multi-course meals in fine dining restuarants, and our family rarely goes out to eat in the evening. I am a firm believer that the best meal to eat out with kids is brunch, but breakfast or lunch work for us, too. We avoid anywhere we know there will be a long wait to get seated, and if we're going to a sit-down restaurant (as opposed to a fast-casual restaurant) we typically order only one course and try to keep things moving by not waiting too long to order, and asking for the check when we get our food.
My goal is always to set G up for success, and that means making sure we avoid asking her to do things that she's not yet capable of. If you're not sure what your child can handle, start small. A quick meal at a fast food restaurant (mobile-order ahead to reduce wait time!) is a great place to start if you haven't dined out or tried it screen-free. We also favor restaurants that are loud enough that a little noise won't disturb anyone, and if it's nice out, eating outdoors is also preferred since it takes off the pressure to be quiet.
Be Prepared
When we go to a sit-down restaurant where we'll have to wait to be seated, wait to order, and wait for our food, it's important that we have some things for G to do while she's waiting. Often watching a room full of people eating is tough, so small snacks are part of it. I like to keep some small toys in our diaper bag for waiting times. Cars are a favorite and can be fun to drive around the table, but the best trick we use is a set of stacking cups. If you don't have these, get them and keep them in your diaper bag! They're a super simple and engaging open-ended toy. When G was between 9 and 18 months, she loved trying to nest the cups, and when that got boring, we placed small snacks, like raisins, in the cups for her to 'find' Now we've elevated the game and if she's struggling with waiting, G closes her eyes, counts to ten, and we hide the small snacks under some of the cups for her to find.
When we have had to go out to dinner because of a family obligation and the wait was longer than G could handle, my husband took her for a walk to get some energy out and then returned to the table after a few minutes.
The most important skill learned in eating out is waiting. Like so many other times when a screen is given to a child, we're taking away an opportunity for them to learn and practice patience. If you aren't sure if waiting matters, just google the marshmallow test. So how to manage a meal screen free? Read on for my favorite tips and tricks.
It all starts at home
We have well-established expectations surrounding food. G is allowed to eat pretty much whenever her little toddler tummy says she needs to, but when we're home, eating is done in one of two places. She either sits at the table in her chair, or if she's having snack while helping me prepare a meal, she's allowed to eat while standing on her learning tower. When we sit down to eat, G knows that she is required to stay at the table while eating, and if she asks to get down, it means she's done with the meal; we don't allow her to come and go from the table. She's currently 27 months old and this has been our routine since she was about eighteen months old. We offer lots of reminders that if she's going to get down to play, she's finished eating, and we also remind her that Mommy and Daddy are still eating, so if she chooses to leave the table she'll be playing alone until we're finished.
Having clear expectations at home has made eating out easier for us because G already knows what to expect during a meal.
Know their limits
G is able to consistently sit through a meal when we go out to eat. That said, we aren't going to multi-course meals in fine dining restuarants, and our family rarely goes out to eat in the evening. I am a firm believer that the best meal to eat out with kids is brunch, but breakfast or lunch work for us, too. We avoid anywhere we know there will be a long wait to get seated, and if we're going to a sit-down restaurant (as opposed to a fast-casual restaurant) we typically order only one course and try to keep things moving by not waiting too long to order, and asking for the check when we get our food.
My goal is always to set G up for success, and that means making sure we avoid asking her to do things that she's not yet capable of. If you're not sure what your child can handle, start small. A quick meal at a fast food restaurant (mobile-order ahead to reduce wait time!) is a great place to start if you haven't dined out or tried it screen-free. We also favor restaurants that are loud enough that a little noise won't disturb anyone, and if it's nice out, eating outdoors is also preferred since it takes off the pressure to be quiet.
Be Prepared
When we go to a sit-down restaurant where we'll have to wait to be seated, wait to order, and wait for our food, it's important that we have some things for G to do while she's waiting. Often watching a room full of people eating is tough, so small snacks are part of it. I like to keep some small toys in our diaper bag for waiting times. Cars are a favorite and can be fun to drive around the table, but the best trick we use is a set of stacking cups. If you don't have these, get them and keep them in your diaper bag! They're a super simple and engaging open-ended toy. When G was between 9 and 18 months, she loved trying to nest the cups, and when that got boring, we placed small snacks, like raisins, in the cups for her to 'find' Now we've elevated the game and if she's struggling with waiting, G closes her eyes, counts to ten, and we hide the small snacks under some of the cups for her to find.
When we have had to go out to dinner because of a family obligation and the wait was longer than G could handle, my husband took her for a walk to get some energy out and then returned to the table after a few minutes.
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